The Avoider
He dodges hard conversations. When conflict arises, he shuts down, walks away, or changes the subject. His wife is left carrying emotional burdens alone while he hides behind work, hobbies, or screens.
Men don't surrender their ground through passivity. Not to fear. Not to comfort. Not to the crowd. This is a movement for men who refuse to be domesticated.
A lion doesn't surrender his ground through passivity. He doesn't go silent when truth needs to be spoken. He doesn't hand his leadership to someone else because it's easier.
Lions protect. Lions lead. Lions stand firm when the pressure says kneel.
A domesticated man bows. A lion never does.
This isn't about aggression. It's about presence. Showing up fully for your wife, your children, your God, and yourself.
Somewhere along the way, men stopped leading. They handed over their voice, their vision, their authority. Not to enemies or tyrants, but to comfort. To avoidance. To the quiet lie that says, "Just keep the peace."
We call it passivity. But passivity is not peace. Passivity is surrender without a fight. It is the slow death of a man who was built to lead but chose to hide. And hiding has consequences that ripple through generations.
A passive man leaves a vacuum. His wife fills it because someone has to. His children grow up without a model of masculine strength. His marriage drifts. His purpose fades. And the world loses another man who could have made a difference but chose silence instead.
This is not about dominance. It's not about control. It's about presence. It's about showing up fully, speaking truth even when it costs you, making decisions instead of deferring them, and carrying the weight that God designed you to carry.
Lions don't bow to the opinions of sheep. They don't shrink to make others comfortable. They don't apologize for their roar. A lion protects, provides, and leads, not because the world demands it, but because it's who he is.
If you've been living small, if you've been avoiding conflict at the cost of your integrity, if you've been letting life happen to you instead of building it, then hear this: It's not too late.
You were not made to be tame. You were not made to blend in. You were made to lead, to fight for your family, to build something that lasts. The world needs men who refuse to be domesticated. Men who stand when it's easier to sit. Men who speak when it's easier to stay silent.
Lions don't bow. And neither should you.
Watch and decide if you're ready to stop making excuses.
Passivity doesn't look like weakness. It looks like avoidance, withdrawal, and silence. And it's destroying families.
He dodges hard conversations. When conflict arises, he shuts down, walks away, or changes the subject. His wife is left carrying emotional burdens alone while he hides behind work, hobbies, or screens.
He says yes to everyone except his own convictions. He won't set boundaries because he fears rejection. His need for approval has made him a passenger in his own life, led by whoever speaks loudest.
He has no vision, no goals, no direction. Days blur together. He reacts to life instead of building it. His family waits for leadership that never comes while he waits for motivation that never arrives.
Articles to help you identify passivity and reclaim masculine leadership.
Passivity creeps in slowly. These seven warning signs reveal whether you've surrendered your leadership without realizing it.
Your wife doesn't want to lead. She's doing it because you won't. Here's how male passivity erodes trust, intimacy, and connection.
Leadership isn't dominance. It's presence, initiative, and service. A practical guide to stepping back into your God-given role.
The excuses keeping you stuck and how to break free from each one. Enter your email and get the guide instantly.
"I spent 12 years avoiding every hard conversation with my wife. Dr. Hines didn't let me hide. For the first time, I'm actually leading my family instead of just existing in it."
"I thought being passive was keeping the peace. It was killing my marriage. Three months in, my wife told me she finally feels like she has a husband again."
"Direct. No fluff. No excuses. Dr. Hines called out patterns I'd been blind to for years. Hard to hear, but exactly what I needed."
Dr. Johnathan Hines, DCC, is a Christian coach who has dedicated his career to one mission: helping men stop being passive and start leading. With over 35,000 clinical hours since 2007, he's seen the devastation that male passivity causes in marriages, families, and communities.
His approach is direct, faith-based, and uncompromising. He doesn't coddle. He doesn't enable. He challenges men to confront the patterns that have kept them small and step into the leadership they were designed for.
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